Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no more duck duck goose at the bar
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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