quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
