I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Randomize
