No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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