Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
