i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize