I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
