Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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