don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
