But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
