I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
