so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
now i know why i became what i already was.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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