Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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