My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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