Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
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