I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
