going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
