The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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