Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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