margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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