her vagine was all disorganized.
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
