Kareoke will never be a sober sport
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
