Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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