lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
