my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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