a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
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I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
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He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
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