My nipple is on Facebook.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
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