Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
