I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
