She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
