Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
