There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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