filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
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