is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
