Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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