ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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