Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
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