How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
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