I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
