whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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