you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
