ra ra ra ah ah
sexting lady gaga style
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(