Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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