I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize