Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
