there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
