And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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