I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
You did what with his pubic hair?
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