This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
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