then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Randomize
